Free PDF Boy Wonder: My Life in Tights, by Burt Ward
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Boy Wonder: My Life in Tights, by Burt Ward
Free PDF Boy Wonder: My Life in Tights, by Burt Ward
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- Sales Rank: #881695 in Books
- Brand: Brand: Logical Figments Inc
- Published on: 1995-09
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: .78" h x 6.05" w x 9.02" l,
- Binding: Paperback
- 300 pages
- Used Book in Good Condition
Most helpful customer reviews
34 of 36 people found the following review helpful.
Arrested Adolescence: A Memoir
By Rather Be Reading
I read this after reading Adam West's book, which isn't the greatest thing on Earth but sure made Ward's look like the trashiest cash-in. Apparently somebody told the author that the way to sell his book--since his co-star had sorta beaten him to the punch--was to sex it up. And he went overboard. I wasn't offended by this, just depressed by the obviousness of his straining to be racy as a sales point, and the adolescent pathos of the bedroom conquistador scenarios he dreamed up to serve it.
Sure, West and Ward no doubt had plenty of women throw themselves at them at the height of their fame. But Ward a.) evokes sexual interludes with prose worthy of a dimestore porn novel circa 1972, b.) describes incidents so ludicrously flattering to him (how he pleasured 8 girls in one go, gave another girl umpteen orgasms in 40 minutes) that it's really hard not to think he didn't make at least half this stuff up, c.) brags about all his conquests incessantly yet prudishly "blames" West for introducing him to such swinging habits, and d.) demonstrates a passive-aggressive hostility toward West throughout.
Oh, he tries qualifying each little stabbing remark (about West's upstaging, his ego, yes even his penis size--small next to the Boy Wonder's, of course) with some "We were great buddies nonetheless" comment. But the undercurrent of resentment is unmistakable, and it doesn't make Ward look good. (By contrast, West has nothing bad to say about Ward in HIS book, and even bemusedly cops to the slightly humiliating fact that while the network had to find ways to minimize Robin's visible "bulge," no such measure was required for his Batman.)
No doubt West left a lot of dirt out in order to stick to the high road. But you get the feeling Ward is creating dirt that never existed here just to serve his own still-immature sense of what sells and his lingering insecurity. Where West created colorful sketches of all the regular "Batman" staff/cast members and numerous guest stars, Ward rarely evinces interest in other people (unless they're another notch in his anti-chastity belt). When he's not writing about yet more dubious sexual exploits, he's writing about stunts that went wrong and other mishaps--I guess the wisdom being that when you can't give 'em sex, give 'em violence. None of this is very interesting.
I gave this two stars because it's far from the worst celebrity autobiography I've read; so many are just godawful. This one is passably written (I mean in terms of grammar, copy editing etc.--it's amazing how even those basics can be lacking in some celebrity-written or "as told to" books). It's obviously designed to be a light read, and what with the short chapters, short paragraphs, breezy uncomplicated prose etc. it's OK as that. The boring/repetitious parts are soon easily identified and thus easy to skim.
I've always figured it must be rough for most actors who become great successes when very young, let alone those who become defined by an early role and can't escape it. They often miss out on all the normal maturing phases of young adulthood (college, low-end first jobs, etc.), and on some levels stay developmentally frozen in adolescence.
That certainly seems to be the case here. Ward means to titillate us with his big-swinging-d--- adventures in the Swinging Sixties (and beyond). But the whole book becomes like the bragging of a 15 year old who grows less and less credible as they continue elaborating their alleged carnal exploits to the point where you just think "It's sad this kid thinks he needs to impress us by making up this stuff." Or even if more of it is true than one suspects, it's sad that Ward still (at 50 or whatever) sounds like a teenage braggart who doesn't realize the grownups in the room are rolling their eyes skyward while he yaps on and on about what a one-horned devil he was. He's like the guest you invite once to your home, then having had quite an overdose of bad personality in one evening, know you never will again.
12 of 14 people found the following review helpful.
Be afraid. Be very afraid...
By Carol T.
Well, let's see... to begin with, it's not a non-fiction masterpiece. I'm giving it three stars just for Burt's gutsy approach. You know, I loved Batman - the original series with Adam West and Burt Ward from watching the show religiously as a child - this was amazing, campy brain candy. Great guests, funny (yet crazy) plots, all of that Holy Batman dialogue and animated "POW" and "WAM" nonsense. As much as I have grown to love anything retro - the cheesier the better, in fact - I did feel a bit dirty after reading this. Who knew these sexcapades were going on? My memories feel a bit soiled as well. But I did snicker a few times (along with some grimacing). Now about that cover... I don't even know where to begin. BURT! WHY? WHY? WHY WOULD'YA DO IT TO US???? Sigh. I'd better stop here. Though it is a must read for any real retro-Batman fan. Just be prepared... Be very prepared...
13 of 16 people found the following review helpful.
Holy Blabbermouth!
By Renee Thorpe
You gotta hand it to Burt Ward, he's not a guy hiding behind the usual mask. He really tells ALL in this memoir of sex, stardom, and life as a sidekick.
Any one of his excruciatingly detailed descriptions of his myriad sexual encounters reads a little like a sex blog, but there's something genuinely likeable about this talented guy who never seemed to grow up. And when I say, "talented," I am not referring to his dorky acting in that atrociously camp TV series. His talents consist mainly of great personal charm, a near photographic memory, early athleticism (pro skater as a toddler? believe it) and impressive martial artistry. Whatever "IT" is, he has it in spades, and the book has a kind of glow about it. He's confident, enthusiastic, funny, and unapologetic. Even when he's dishing dirt about Adam West (Batman), or devouring groupies like a bag of chips, he's utterly captivating and ...I don't believe I'm actually writing this... playful.
In between the smutty sections, there are lots of interesting tidbits about 60's network television, vignettes of what it means to make the best of being forever known as "Robin the Boy Wonder", and through it all, he manages to stay juuuuust gentlemanly enough to praise the good work of fellow actors and those whom he depended upon. But surely his wife is just a little grossed out to know that in print and wide distribution is his rating her AAA+ in "screaming wallbangers", multiple orgasms, and "tongue action" a page flip away from a lovely baby picture of their daughter. Eeeyw!
Fun reading for fans of the series or of 60's tv in general, but don't take it too seriously, fandom folks. I mean, he even admitted he never read Batman comics as a kid.
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